Is controlling anger the answer or do you need to understand the nature of why you may feel angry?
Anger is a natural emotion and can be powerful and relevant in certain circumstances, for example, feeling angry as part of the grief cycle is natural.
Anger is often closely linked with depression and pain. It can provoke you into taking action and moving forward with your life, taking yourself out of a bad situation, making change happen and improving your life for the better. You may need to communicate your anger about a situation or behaviour to improve a relationship.
There are times when anger is inappropriate. Taking your frustrations out on other people is always wrong, whether verbally or physically. Being angry with yourself also makes no sense as it cannot achieve anything. Often this anger ties in with feelings of low self-worth, lack of control or unrealistic expectations in life.
Being angry with yourself because you have made a mistake, do not have the right skills or experience or you are convinced you are a failure are classic low self esteem issues. Overcoming anger in these situations is down to learning to accept yourself for who you are, a human being, who makes mistakes sometimes. You can learn new skills or gain experience, the importance is to take action and move forward, without beating yourself up.
There are situations in life that are outside of our control. There is little point becoming overly angry; traffic jams, people’s reactions, tax increases are all aspects over which we have little control.
Are your expectations of yourself, others and life unrealistic? You hoped to get that promotion but it never happened. You want your teenage daughter to keep her room tidy. You wanted a perfect vacation with no family arguments.
Controlling Anger – The Answer?
Life doesn’t always go your way. It is neither fair nor unfair. Instead of thinking about controlling
anger consider if your anger is appropriate. If it is, use it constructively. If not, take a deep breath and move on.
If anger is a real problem in your life consider taking an anger management course, which you can do online or in person at a local class. Other tools to consider are hypnosis products for anger management, which can help you address the issues causing the anger and learn to switch off before the emotion takes over.